Why do some mothers hate their daughters especially when they're the eldest?

I've stopped interacting with her almost entirely and barely see her anymore. Since February I've gone on multiple day trips with my sisters and this coming January we will be skipping her birthday to get a cabin in the mountains out of state to celebrate my own birthday that same weekend, followed by a cruise in February. I just spent Thanksgiving week with my grandfather and sisters and friends over my mom, our first major holiday without her after she skipped out on multiple birthdays throughout the year within the family. Neither her brother nor her stepfather have spoken to her in several months and I can tell they're grieving in their own way. When my great aunt made an offer to us about her husband's scooter I told my aunt I'd purchase it myself because by that point I did not feel safe letting her sell it to my mother to give to me, let alone keep it at her residence. I live in a more hood county but I'd rather run the risk of keeping my vehicle with me than let her try to hold it over my head as some narcissistic collateral.

When she got into a physical altercation between my sisters and my roommate, I chose them over her. My siblings have had my back for years now, and it was time I repay the favor, especially after we learned that she pushed my roommate's cat out the window during her moving process and shut her out with no regards for what might happen to her. Fortunately a neighbor caught her and returned her to my roommate after a little less than a month, and she is now safe at home with her. She also attempted to cut off her stepfather, who is housing my roommate and one of my sisters. He had to change the locks for the first time in probably decades because my mother has been on a downward spiral since we all made the decision to move out and she had lost multiple lawsuits that she attempted to file against them.

My mother doesn't like me. I look like her but I don't think like her, act like her, have most her interests or her life goals. I'm asexual, I have no plans to have kids and likely don't see myself getting married now or in the future.

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Since I looked like her I guess she expected that I would be her mini me. When I was younger we were somewhat close, but after I began figuring myself out, especially when it came to my sexuality, that's where she started to change how she treated me. For the record, she was one of those “you'll change your mind” parents, especially when it came to sex, kids and marriage. From a young age I knew that I didn't see myself being a mom, at least not biological. I've considered adoption but who knows where that will go. I also was not interested in having sex and was indifferent to the idea of marriage.

Today I read romantasy novels and yes, there's sex, especially in the ones by a favorite author of mine who writes well enough that the sex scenes are easy to dismiss. I also read manga, sew, do diamond art and watch anime, hobbies that she herself does not enjoy. I drink both pepsi and coke products and prefer vanilla over chocolate, I don't like her meatloaf and liverwurst makes me feel physically ill. I also look better in red than she does and prefer green, blue, yellow and peach whereas she loves almost exclusively purple and she hates pink whereas I like wearing pink makeup and pink accessories.